Why people hate networking events
Networking can be a valuable tool for small business owners - especially those on a limited budget.
Unfortunately some people hate the idea of it.
Being the inquisitive type I recently asked a client why they were so hesitant to attend an event I’d suggested. As she’s a naturally outgoing, ‘people person’, I thought it’d be right up her street.
Anyway, she had a load of, not unfounded, reasons why she hated the idea of a networking events - so I thought they might be worth looking at:
- “It’ll be full of people trying to sell me things” - Unfortunately that is sometimes true. Nobody likes to be sold to but some people see networking events as the perfect opportunity to push their wares. The good news is that most people aren’t like that and when you meet someone who is, simply ask for their card and move on.
- “I don’t want to stand there and try to sell to other people either” - Good, because most people will simply ask for your card and move on. This is where many networkers go wrong. Networking events are not opportunities to sell, they are opportunities to network. That means meeting people, getting introduced, making introductions and building stronger relationships. To take the pressure off myself at networking events, I aim to find someone or someones who share a common customer type - I’m looking for potential partners rather than potential clients - and that means learning more about them than talking about myself.
- “I’m just a startup business I won’t fit in” - Part of successful networking is choosing the right events to attend. Some are very corporate and staid, some are simply an excuse for a few drinks. Choose the kind of event that suits you best but also bear in mind that quite often the attendees will be bored seeing the same faces at every event - a bit of new blood with a new business could easily be the life of the party.
- “My kind of customers aren’t there” - Again, you shouldn’t go networking to find customers. If you are looking to find anyone then try finding potential partners who share a common target market. Failing that, most of my media contacts and suppliers have come from networking events - again it’s more interesting to find out about them than to talk about myself.
- “There’s no chance to do any real business there anyway” - So change your goal from trying to doing real business (which won’t happen) to organising a cup of coffee. If I meet someone that I think I can work with I suggest meeting for a coffee a few days later - it’s casual, non-committal (but more committal than a promised phone call) and friendly. A successful event might lead to 5 or 6 meetings over the following weeks.
- “I don’t know anybody, who will I talk to?” - Funnily enough you’ll probably not be the only person in that boat. The simplest answer is to work out a single sentence introduction to yourself and then get stuck in. If that’s not you, try going with a more experienced ‘networking buddy’ who can make a few introductions for you and if you can’t find one of them, ask the event organiser to introduce you.
The biggest issue people have with networking is the assumption that it’s an opportunity to sell. If you approach it in that manner not only will it be unenjoyable but it will also be unproductive.
Network to build contacts and relationships with people that you can work with - not sell to. Do that and that sales will take care of themselves through word-of-mouth, referrals and introductions made for you.
Update: Piaras Kelly has some useful additions to this conversation on his Public Relations in Ireland blog.
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3 comments
What works for me is to approach networking as a way to find people who might be able to help others that I know.
This gives me a reason to talk to others outside my area; makes me feel good if I can help make a connection; gives others a reason to appreciate me (without needing to sell to them); and, increases the liklihood of them doing the same for me.
Great point Tamsin - being the ‘connector’ tends have loads of positive spin-off effects.
Probably something worthy of its own post.
Thanks again.
[...] response to a post I wrote last week on networking, Tamsin Fox-Davies commented that she approaches networking with the intention of finding [...]
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